Happy New Year to the many millions of readers of helenandjo.com around the world!
Idiots and scumbags are forever dumping stuff in our road. The other day I came across what looked like a scary snake in a cage. It’s not really a snake, of course, merely a length of hosepipe. But it must be dangerous otherwise why would it be in a cage? I don’t know why someone has abandoned a hose in a cage in our road – it’s another unsolvable Helenandjo Mystery.
Meet Willy the Worm who came out of my Advent calendar the other day. He is a bit disconcerting as worms don’t normally have eyes or faces. I would say he looks more like a cross between a frog and a worm.
This year helenandi have SEPARATE Advent calendars. Helen has the OLD one and I have a NEW one made by Helen’s Mum.
It is full of excellent surprises like Willy. I wonder what Helen has found in her Advent calendar.
It’s been a while since I have posted on helenandjo.com This is not because interesting things have not been happening. Quite the reverse, it is because too many interesting thing have been going on so I never have any time.
Anyway, I have a couple of spare minutes in which to tell about something very interesting – or rather very boring: My quest for “Inbox Zero”.
This is something I read about somewhere, possibly in a magazine, and it has become my new obsession. I must delete or file all my emails until there are NONE left in my inbox. When I started I had nearly 50,000 emails in my inbox. I am now down to just under 29,000. This is a MAJOR achievement and worth celebrating. I don’t know how long it will take me to get to zero. The trouble is that new emails keep coming in so I need to ensure I am deleting at a faster rate than the rate at which they arrive.
People will say this is just an extension of my obsession with tidying and I suppose it is. I am letting my life slip away while I concentrate on being neat.
The new owners of our local convenience store – formerly known as Pricesnipper – have come up with brilliant business idea: setting up a beauty salon next to the bins. This is worse than the time the former owner tried to set up a Parisian-style pavement cafe amid the litter and bus fumes.
The new salon – located in the shop’s old storeroom – is called Blooming Beauty or rather Blummin’ Beauty. It offers a very wide range of treatments including eyelash extensions, eyebrow tinting, manicures and facials as well as “buttocks waxing”. It is all very glamorous which is why it is a shame you have to edge round several overflowing industrial waste bins to get there.
Readers of Helenandjo.com will have been kept awake at night, worrying about what happened to the missing Advent gift. Well, I can announce that the mystery is solved! The missing gift was in my bag all the time!!! Here it is:
Whatever can it be?
Oh dear. It is a jolly Merry Christmas badge complete with a mini Santa hat. Unfortunately, due to my blundering I will not be able to wear it until NEXT Christmas.
This is the moment we have all been waiting for – the climax of the Helenandjo Advent Calendar 2018. Here is the last present, balanced on my knee while I wait for the train to Sparrow. Webmaster Matt will be impressed that I have done many of my Advent posts on the move using my PHONE. Anyway…
Whatever can it be?
Wowee!!! It’s a £10 note. We’re rich! I will give some to charity and share the rest with Helen. Merry Christmas everyone!!! Continue reading “Advent – Day 24”
Whatever can it be?
We’re not sure.
A helenandjo mystery for day 23.
I was sure that I had one more parcel left but it seems to have vanished and I can’t find it anywhere. So either I have imagined it or it has been eaten by a cat.
To add to the confusion there are some chocolate coins which could be today’s gift but Jo had assumed they were extra and has given them to a h&j b&b guest so we don’t even have them to post a picture of. Jo has one more parcel but we are saving that for tomorrow.
I might have to check with my mum whether the coins were extra or for one of the days.
This is nothing compared to the confusion in Jo’s family about whether they are getting her glasses or glasses for Christmas.