Helen won’t like this but Dan and I have just bought some cookies, 13 cookies to be precise. I have shared them out amongst my colleagues but they are all on diets (LOSERS!) and between them have consumed about an eighth of a cookie. That means more for us. Other important things that I have done today include dowloading an application form to be a magistrate. I suppose I should do some work…


Speculation is mounting over a suspected rift between world famous B&B proprietors Helen and Jo because Helen has FAILED to contribute to their new website.
A source close to Jo said: “Jo feels very lonely and is worried that she looks sad because she has written about a million entries and Helen has done NONE.”
Helen was unavailable for comment.

Daniel has just made me some tea

So far today I have made one phone call and then labelled my NEW stacking in-tray. Getting this was like getting a Christmas present except much, much less exciting. But, good news! M’colleague Daniel has just made me some tea.

PS Is this the dullest web log in the history of the internet?

From now on I will write my entries in the style of a sleazy tabloid newspaper.

I hate work and wish I was dead

Hello. This is my first entry on I’d like to register my disgust at the fact that I am at work. Work is evil. I hate work and think it should be banned. However, I am delighted that I have this website because it will mean I have something to do to make it look like I’m working very hard. Thank you Matt.